Building Resilience and Growth Mindset in Children: A Guide for Parents

As parents, we all want our children to thrive, not just academically but emotionally as well. But what does it mean to build resilience in our children? How can a growth mindset pave the way for their long-term success? Dr. Kaylee Sumner’s insights on nurturing a child’s emotional and cognitive development through positive psychology and practical strategies offer invaluable guidance. Let’s dive into these strategies and discover how you can play a pivotal role in shaping your child’s future.

Why Resilience and Growth Mindset Matter

Childhood is more than just a time for play and learning; it’s the critical stage for building the foundation of resilience. Resilience is the ability to bounce back from challenges, and it’s key to maintaining emotional and mental well-being throughout life. The good news? The brain’s neuroplasticity—the ability to grow and adapt—means it’s never too late to nurture resilience.

Resilience isn’t about making your child unshakable on their own. It’s a balance of developing personal coping mechanisms and surrounding them with supportive environments. In fact, research shows that just one strong and supportive adult can have a transformative impact on a child’s ability to overcome obstacles. You could be that person.

What Is a Growth Mindset—and Why Is It Vital?

A growth mindset, a term popularized by psychologist Carol Dweck, is the belief that abilities and intelligence can be developed through dedication and hard work. Children with a growth mindset embrace challenges, view mistakes as opportunities to learn, and celebrate progress rather than comparing themselves to others.

Teaching children to see challenges as stepping stones, rather than roadblocks, sets them up for academic perseverance and emotional resilience. By shifting their internal dialogue with phrases like “I can’t do this” to “I can’t do this yet,” you empower them to see effort as a pathway to mastery.

The Power of Emotion Coaching

One of the most effective tools in nurturing resilience is emotion coaching. This involves acknowledging children’s feelings and helping them regulate emotions in constructive ways. When a child feels validated, they’re more likely to figure out how to navigate their emotions and build positive mental health habits.

Here’s how emotion coaching works:

Recognize emotions as opportunities for connection and teaching moments.
Validate feelings so children feel heard and understood.
Guide problem-solving by offering tools and strategies to manage emotions effectively.

When you help children work through big emotions, you’re setting them up to handle life’s inevitable ups and downs with confidence.

The “Power of Yet”

We often hear children say things like, “I’m just not good at math,” or “I can’t do this.” This mindset, a roadblock to learning, can lead to self-doubt and a fear of failure. Reframing these declarations with the simple addition of the word yet can make all the difference.

For example:

“I can’t solve this problem” → “I can’t solve this problem yet.”
“I’m not good at soccer” → “I’m not good at soccer yet.”

This small but powerful shift encourages children to see challenges as opportunities and focus on improvement rather than perfection.

The Impact of Trauma on Resilience

It’s impossible to talk about resilience without addressing the role of trauma. Children who experience trauma often find it harder to “bounce back.” However, creating emotional safety and teaching self-regulation techniques can make a huge difference in their ability to develop resilience.

By addressing trauma early and teaching coping mechanisms, you give your child the tools to process their emotions in healthy ways, improving their chances of thriving both emotionally and academically.

Real-World Parenting Outcomes

Programs rooted in evidence-based parenting strategies, such as the one Dr. Sumner highlights, show promising results. Parents report increased confidence in their ability to handle difficult situations, better emotional stability, and practical tools to support their child’s growth. These strategies empower families to navigate challenges together, fostering deeper connections and a stronger sense of well-being.

As parents, investing time in building these skills in ourselves and our children creates a ripple effect that can transform our families, schools, and communities for the better.

Actionable Takeaways for Parents

Encourage your child to adopt a growth mindset by reframing failure and focusing on effort.
Practice emotion coaching to validate your child’s feelings and build their emotional intelligence.
Use the “Power of Yet” to help children see challenges as opportunities for growth.
Create a safe and supportive environment where your child feels seen and heard.
Address trauma and big feelings with patience and compassion.

Remember, parenting isn’t about being perfect—it’s about being present. By fostering resilience and a growth mindset, you’re giving your child lifelong tools to navigate challenges with confidence, creativity, and optimism.

Parenting is a journey, and building resilience and fostering a growth mindset are two of the greatest gifts you can give your child. These strategies not only help your child navigate life’s challenges but also strengthen your bond as a family.

So, embrace the messy moments, celebrate small victories, and remember: resilience grows in the face of adversity—it’s never too late to start.